The “assets” that make or break us: Relationships and resources

Last month, I discovered Jake the therapist’s instagram account and shared my new word: temporal disintegration (aka, oh look, it’s Blursday. Again.)

Well, he’s done it again. Shared something so good, I have to post it here.

You may have heard of the ACE’s (Adverse Childhood Experiences) but have you heard about PACE’s?⁣

PACE’s are the Protective And Compensatory Experiences that increase resilience & protect against risk.⁣

PACE’s fall into two categories: Relationships & Resources.⁣



Relationships: Relational safety, having a reliable friend, needs are met often enough, opportunity to connect socially, empathy and connection is available, experiencing repair after relational rupture.⁣



Resources: Routines & hobbies, accessing a supportive network, volunteering, giving, helping, and contributing to something, adopting a breathing or mindfulness practice, and having opportunities for activity and self-regulation.

How do I be more resilient? How do I try and help my kiddo be more resilient, when I can’t even really meaningfully or reliably plan what we’re going to do next week, never mind project what kind of world he’ll graduate into? This is like a little road-map that just landed in my lap. I can direct my attention towards relationships and resources, and invest some energy in tending that aspect of my life.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s